Adjust

Recently I learn that I need to adjust to the will of GOD, yeah I admit it’s my entire fault. Because of my great fear. But still it always takes 2 to tango. Hehehe well I am adjusting now, I am trying to be calm all the time, and to have control. I’m a very impulsive person. I’m learning how to control my emotions so that when I see him I wont get wrong, I wont hurt him, GOD is slowly showing me everything, what to do and what I have done, and teaching me of how to improve and all. HE is really amazing. Now I have to learn to talk to him not in panic mode, I need to learn to converse with him, and I need to learn to smile to him, very important, because we two started with a smile. Imagine how simple does my problem sound, but guess what it’s really a big problem to me. Hahaha I keep practicing, looking at the mirror practising how to talk to him, how to smile to him, how to approach, what to say, not just for a moment ah, I’ve been thinking how to adjust the whole day, imagine that, this really taking me a big effort, if he only knew. It’s really hard for me, I don’t know why too, in my whole life, I think this is the first time I felt something like this, too awkward too weird for me, because I am a people relation person, but with him, my tongue is gone, when I see him I panic, and I want to hide, hahaha torpe! Torpe ako! Hahaha I don’t know, hay.. how I hope to say to him to please exert more effort, because I am having a hard time, the thing is we we’re the same, Torpe! hehehe And I know he have exerted effort too, and got hurt, how I wanted to say sorry ^_^ anyway since GOD is leading me to exert more effort in adjusting, I will. ^_^