slap

since November..I want to slap him on the face.. so imagine now.. how much I wanted too..but I need to practice self-control.. and let GOD do the slapping.. I will wait patiently for that day.. I will observe.. I will observe.. this is all I wanna do.. be still and say nothing.. I believe GOD is just.. HE will fight for me.. for I am HIS..

awhile ago tears falls my eyes because I am full of anger, I want to slap him.. I hate him for coming into my life.. and doing these things to me.. he don't know how to love, he knows love and what is love.. but he don't know how to practice it.. he failed to love.. he only love himself.. selfish.

whole morning I am talking to GOD as I woke up.. kept asking for forgiveness for all my sins..

my sin regarding this matter..
1. I made GOD jealous, for loving this person, forgetting that I was only asked by GOD to love and accept this person.. not to love him more than HIM.

his sins
1. He have changed, he love himself to the point he idolize himself. he becomes a monster, not the same person GOD showed me.
2. He idolize the fact that there are girls around him, waiting for him and that he have lots of choices.

GOD showed me his heart before, but he is now changed.. he is not the same person that I learned to love. last Sept. I have noticed his changes, I told him that..but I tried to play blind and continue to love him.